It's whats your whinge Wednesday.
The one day of the week that you can whinge freely to your hearts content.
Ahhh, feels good doesn't it?
As it's breast cancer awareness month this October, my whinge is all about boob's.
Big and small. It doesn't seem to matter. Men love them all. Women always want what they don't have.
I am no exception to this rule.
There is a reason that breast reduction surgery exists. And I am it.
Please welcome to the floor my 12 F or sometimes G breasts.
It seems that this letter/number combination is unheard of in most lingerie shops. And shop assistants are ever so apologetic about it as they try and squeeze you into something else so they can make a sale.
Boob hanging out the side? No worries, you cant even notice it!
Bra cutting your boob in half, that's also find too apparently.
And that whole I-don't-actually-have-two-breasts-its-just-one-big-shelf look, totally in at the moment!
Trying to find ANYTHING that fit's is a hassle.
Then try and find it in something that doesn't look like a hand me down bra from your grandmother.
The shop assistants always have this knack of making me feel like more out of proportion than I feel.
"wow, you have a really small back to be carrying those around'
Lady, Don't I know it! Hence the pain. The hunch. The shrinking vertebrae.
They wobble when I walk. They bounce when I dance. And don't even think about running, jumping, or doing the worm.
I am putting a call out today, to all lingerie companies, MAKE ME SOMETHING THAT IS HUGE BUT PRETTY!!!!
And to clothing companies, please, I beg you, make me clothes that fit my bust, but taper in small enough to fit my size 12 rest of body, so i no longer have to look like I constantly wear a potato sack.
And to all you wankers who go and get yourself enhanced to this size, Grow a brain, seriously.