Wednesday, December 8, 2010

I can see clearly now

It's getting to that dreaded time of year again for me. The anniversary of my mum's passing.
This time is of year is always a struggle for me, and I spend so much time worrying about the rest of my family. My sisters were young when my mum passed, so this time is always hard for them. It is really brought to light the things that they have missed out on, the greiving they didn't get a chance to do/didn't know how to do because they were so young ( 10 and 14). It always makes me feel so lucky, yet so gulity for all the things that I got to have her around for. Puberty, my graduation, the birth of my 1st child.

It took me a long time to come to terms with her death, even though I spent years watching it slowly happen. I guess, until it happened, somewhere within me I never actually believed that it would.

I have mentioned before that my mum planned her funeral. And I have recently realised what she was trying to tell us by doing so.
I know so many people that are going through a similar thing, and I cant imagine how many that I don't know are going through it also. So I wanted to share this with you. To share her message. To share what has helped me with all the  Why did this happen, and It's so unfair's.

Please, listen to this song. I know we have all heard it, but please REALLY  listen to it.

Listen to the lyrics.

Getting the message??

My mum chose to have this played as she was being carried out to the hearse. And let me tell you now, at that moment, it was the single most horrendous thing ever!

For YEARS I couldn't listen this song. I would break down to a blubbering mess.

Now, after trying to remove myself from the pain, and looking at that moment as the last that I had with her, I realise what she was saying to us.

Passing was the best thing that could have happened to her at that time. She was happy.
The rain had gone, the dark clouds had disappeared.
We needed to make it a bright sun sunny day! And live our lives that way.

While it still hurts to listen to this, and to think about that day, while I still have tears in my eyes now from listening to that song, and feeling the memories, it has also got me past years of grieving.

Through the years of depression, this was there to save me all along, I just needed to look a little deeper rather than just skimming the surface.

Whatever you are going through, remember it's like crossing the road. You must Stop, Look and Listen.

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Generation Sunny!

What is wrong with the world these days?
I mean seriously, what the HELL is going on?
This post has been working its way around my head for a while now, but tonight, its exploding.

It seems I have read one too many blog posts over the past week while being stuck at home due to flood water. And it has done my head in.
While, by writing this, I am probably not any better than the people that have come before me, but I do feel that I have a message to get out there, and it's not the one that is being sent through so many 'mummy blogs' lately!

Now, the parenting judgment has been going on for a while, and I must admit, that I can get caught up in it too, especially having an early childhood background, its very easy to pick up peoples flaws, but I have learnt to not judge. That parenting isn't as easy as it may seem on the outside. Take a deeper look......

What has really P****d me off though, is hearing EVERYONE putting mothers down. For sooooo many different reasons! It truly is disgusting. Who cares which school your child goes to, What school shoes you buy for them, if they have brand name bloody socks! Seriously!!!

We are so busy putting each other down, and picking on our own, and other peoples faults, while at the same time using a quote that I'm sure has hit every mummy blog that I have seen

                             .... ' We are raising the next generation'.....

We certainly are. And this is something we should be mindful of. But, I ask you to look at it in a different light to others, I ask you to think about this.

We are raising the next generation.
We need to show them how to be the best person THEY can be. Not be better than their neighbour.
We need to teach them love and happiness. Tolerance and kindness.
We need to teach them friendship, to stand together. To fight for their beliefs.
We need to teach them to never give up.

To teach them this, we need to show them this!

The next generation will learn through our actions.

So rather than criticising your neighbour for the way they might be parenting, because they are after all bringing up the next generation, remember, you are bringing UP the next generation also. And the next generation is watching YOU!.

If you want to join a brilliant group of women, who always look for the sun, and try and find the rays in every cloud, you need to join the Sunny Mummy Sisterhood! Help us to spread the rays, and teach the next generation that sunshine really is good for you! Help to bring UP the next generation.